Guy on train: Man, those tights are deceiving, it looks like you have spots all over your legs
Me: actually, there is something terribly wrong with me.  I’m covering even worse spots with these tights.
Guy: if you want to repel guys, those are the tights to wear.
Me: It’s so annoying, I have this problem where random guys try to talk to me all the time.
Guy: I think you’re wearing the right tights then.
Me: and still you are talking to me
(Guy puts on his headphones)